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Why on EARTH are people still going to Transformers films?
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 1:27 pm Reply with quote

It astounds me how audiences are still lapping up this horseshit.

Granted, the first movie was a pleasant surprise. A fun popcorn flick.

I rolled my eyes when I heard stories of people walking out of Revenge of the Fallen. Film snobs, I thought.

Then I sat down to watch it. And all I can remember is a distressing awareness of how DVT can set in after long periods sat down.

After Michael Bay said that he'd learnt the lessons of part two, I happily sat down to watch Dark of the Moon. A return to form, I assumed.

Fuck. It's actually worse. But only because it's longer.

I remember me and my friend checking how long was left, as we assumed it was near the end and to say we felt let down was an understatement.

There was another 40 minutes to go. It was like having your hand blown off in a Murphy-Clarence copycat killing, knowing the worst was still to come.

I gave Transformers a second chance and they shat in my eye sockets.

And yet, for some insane reason, I tried to revisit Revenge and Moon last year. Convinced the overlong running time might be the only problem, I decided I'd rewatch each in two halves.

I didn't get to Revenge Part 2. Excrement now smeared in my nostrils.

That's why you couldn't pay me to sit through Age of Extinction. I don't want shit in my mouth this time.

The fact that Jose Padhila's RoboCop only did average box office business in the US boggles the mind when people flock to this crap worldwide.

And yet, as a Robo fan, if you asked me, "Would I prefer the new RoboCop to have had the box office returns of a Transformers movie?", my answer would be - certainly not. Not if it was the giant, unwatchable mess like Transformers that I couldn't sit through.

And Empire magazine (supposedly a proper movie publication) still slag off RoboCop (2014) whilst selling their souls and giving Transformers its front cover.

I don't care if America is Robophobic. I'm happy if Jose Padhila's RoboCop was a film made just for me.




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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 2:25 pm Reply with quote

Don't think Empire or any other big magazine gives a front cover for free. You could say maybe the reviews are to be impartial, but the rest of pages of the magazine are negotiated with the film distributors.

Anyway it is interesting how critics have declared war on "Transformers 4" and yet the film is doing a superb box-office.

To me the explanation should be the target audience (teenagers), they are more interested in amazing special effects and a 3D breathtaking experience than anything else, well maybe hot girls too. They are also an audience prone to go re-watch spectacular films they liked. Just ask yourself, if you were 13 years old would you go watch "Transformers 4" and talk about it with your friends at school? And even if it is PG-13 I would like to know how many younger kids go with their parents (more tickets to sell).

The second explanation is China, where the number of Hollywood films released in there is limited every year, so it is a great event, something special, to go watch at theaters a Hollywood blockbuster with the best special effects. In this case also one third of the movie takes place in China, and you can see some Chinese actors in there, so the interest is huge.

Robocop did pretty well in China, but mostly thanks to being one of not many American films released there. Also the Chinese element of the plot was not really exploited, Robo is built in a Chinese factory in the middle of nowhere, and that's all.




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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 5:15 pm Reply with quote

All very true.

Thing is, whilst I was kind of blown away by the effects in the first film, much more amazing things have been done now with Avatar, Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes and Godzilla.

I don't know anyone, young or old, who actually loves the Transformers sequels. I think parents take their kids because of the 'brand'. They've heard of it, that's why they go.

Still though, if I went to see GuardIans Of The Galaxy and Avengers: Age Of Ultron and they were really really terrible, I wouldn't be noting the release date of Ant-Man in my diary. I don't get why the two films before haven't 'damaged the brand'. I suppose the brand is bigger than the movies.

The Marvel analogy doesn't quite work because I might consider going to a Transformers film if they made it 90 minutes with a different director. But they'd really have to 'go some' to impress me.

Obviously, very few sequels are better than their originals, but what makes some franchises interesting - for better or worse - are different directors' visions or approaches.




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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 6:16 pm Reply with quote

Well the premise of Transformers 4 is that they're supposed to be 'dying out' and the subtitle of the film is called 'Age of Extinction', so hopefully Michael Bay is finally done with the franchise once and for all. Besides, he's already busy working on TMNT.

I honestly can't believe there's TWO Michael Bay films coming out in (or almost) the same year.
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 6:39 pm Reply with quote

I'm hoping his role as producer on TMNT means it won't be too bad, but early signs aren't good. I don't think we appreciate on here how lucky we were to have actors on the calibre of Keaton, Oldman, Jackson and Kinnaman. And that Super Shredder. What the fuck?! It really is like Bay thinks like a 6000 SUX. Bigger is not always better.



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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 6:46 pm Reply with quote

Hey people think the same thing about the RoboCop franchise. why did they reboot it as the first lot were shite. (not my words lol)

at one time they said the same thing about the Batman franchise too.

each to their own, we all enjoy different franchise's ours is RoboCop others like Transformers...


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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 8:10 pm Reply with quote

I think there is a point and need for dumb movies as well. Transformers is mainly just 2 hours of dumb characters, stupid jokes, good looking cars and women. And explosions. It's an expensive spectacle and sometimes we just want to see stuff blow up and forget our real life troubles for a while. Something like that.

I've seen all three Transformers movies but it was all for the reason of shutting down my brain for a while. They are all quite terrible but can work if you're in the right mindset.




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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 8:23 pm Reply with quote

I agree there must be a space for dumb movies, the problem is when dumb movies are at the top of this cultural ladder that is film industry, and when they set records of box-office and number of viewers I think it is legit to get a bit worried or at least upset...

If dumb movies were not the epitome of success in cinema maybe studios would need to divert more money into producing intelligent and original movies, until then we will get flooded with more and more superhero sequels and imitations.




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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 10:42 pm Reply with quote

I agree with Archive, he pretty much put why people go to see these movies - They're there for folks who want to watch something and not think. Which is mostly teens. Of course there are plenty of adults too who just want to sit, put their brains on standby and watch some cool explosions and shit for a while, as said. I just about cannot do that myself, but I still saw several of the Transformers films and found them mostly fine for what they are. I don't like what they are in the first place but I'm not gonna be down on them because of that necessarily. But hey, there's no law saying you can't be down on them for that and/or other reasons.

For me mostly, I too share artu's wariness in regard to how popular a lot of these all-fluff 'dumb & pretty' movies get, and moreso that they seem to be popular to the detriment of deeper and smarter films. They get overshadowed and pushed aside. But as said, when you're some dumbass teenager with too much time and money on your hands, you're not gonna go to what looks interesting or thought-provoking, you're gonna go to what looks neat and awesome, what is hip and 'the brand' (as said) and all that crap.

And that's the deal. Ultimately, it's all about what the people at large will pay to see, and if that is the shit they want, well, lets just say I don't hold my breath about the film industry going for more interesting and intelligent stuff personally - As said, they'll continue to do this kind of thing because that's where the money is. Good business is where you find it, ya know. Bah.
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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 2:45 am Reply with quote

Archive :
I've seen all three Transformers movies but it was all for the reason of shutting down my brain for a while. They are all quite terrible but can work if you're in the right mindset.


I agree that's a need for mindless entertainment. I do this kind of thing all the time with music. My favorite artists are Lou Reed, Pink Floyd and Joy Division. They are all great but their music is very heavy. Some of my friends can't understand why I would follow up such a dense and emotionally expressive album as Wish You Were Here with generic, ignorant rap, but I call it palette cleansing. If I'm chilling with my friends and playing music all day there's a need to break up the heaviness. So after every Rolling Stones or Neil Young album I'll play a little bit of Kanye, Pusha T or especially 2 Chainz. They don't seem to understand that I'm listening to their music because of its flaws, not overlooking them. Other non-rap stuff I use as palette cleansers includes ambient / instrumental music like the works of Brian Eno and DJ Krush, or a touch or jazz.

The same principle applies to movies. I know personally if I've been watching a lot of movies recently I usually watch about half comedies. The more dramatic, intellectual movie is always 'better', but it gets grueling watching dram after drama or action flick after action flick. I don't go out to the movies a lot so I don't think it would be worth it to go see the new Transformers, but I'll definitely watch it when it comes on Netflix, because I know their will be a day when I'm stoned and just wanna little entertainment and don't have it in me to watch another Crying Game level drama.




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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 3:34 pm Reply with quote

It;'s the lowest common denominator.

Flashy effects, gorgeous women, action, dubstep, and a teen audience.

I don't mind watching a dumb movie, but it's still got to be decent. Transformers ain't...




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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 4:19 pm Reply with quote

The Transformers movies are basically an insult to people who care about Transformers and a movie spectacle to everyone else basically. When I movie is called Transformers, I don't care if it's gonna have hot chicks or dumb jokes in it, I want to see CGI versions of my toys beating the crap out of each other. But the movie just forgets who the stars are in order to bring in a wider audience. I can see why people go see them, what I can't see is why Transformers fans keep seeing them...
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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 6:02 pm Reply with quote

RoboFan_93 :
The Transformers movies are basically an insult to people who care about Transformers


Just like the Dark Knight movies are an insult to anyone who cares about Batman!

Or how the X-men movies are an insult to anyone who cares about X-men!

I think the argument here is not wether they are faithful adaptions or not, but if the movies stand on their own merit. None of these movies based off of comics books, or in the case of Transformers and GI Joe based off toys, are accurate to the source material, but the massive success of them speaks to their ability to stand alone. While the Dark Knight is a horrendous version of Batman people love that movie. Same goes for the Transformers, but this debate I think it questioning if they are worth watching at all, regardless of what they are based on. This is the argument fans of these kind of movies always make: judge them on the quality of the movie alone, not in comparison to what its based on.




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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2014 7:22 pm Reply with quote

With all our complaints though, Michael Bay definitely knows what he is doing behind the camera. All his movies are visually gorgeous and beautifully shot. I'd say even his shaky-cam scenes look good and have some thought put into them.

Something we can't say about Jose Padilha whose work is close to amateurish at times. RoboCop 2014 with its big budget looks awfully close to a low budget film.




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